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How a 7 Year Old Explain Sex…

September 17th, 2006 by fountainpen

haha… natawa tlga ako nung nabasa ko tong post ni jong sa blog nya… kaya basahin nyo rin.. hehe..

Little Johnny was 7 years old
and like
other boys
his age rather
curious.

He had been hearing quite a bit
about ‘making out’
from the older boys, and he wondered
what it was
and how it was done.

One day he took his question to his
mother, who
became rather flustered. Instead of
explaining
things to Johnny, she told him to hide
behind the
curtains one night and watch his older
sister and
her boyfriend.

This he did. The following morning,
Johnny
described EVERYTHING to his mother.

“Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for
a while,
then he turned off most of the lights.
Then he
started kissing and hugging her. I
figured ‘Sis must
be getting sick, because her face started
looking
funny.

He must have thought so too, because he
put his
hand inside her blouse to feel her heart,
just the
way the doctor would. Except he’s not as
smart as
the doctor because he seemed to have
trouble
finding her heart. I guess he was getting
sick too,
because pretty soon both of them started
panting
and getting all out of breath.

His other hand must have been cold
because he
put it under her skirt.

About this time ‘Sis got worse and began
to moan
and sigh and squirm around and slide
down
toward
the end of the couch. This was when her
fever
started. I knew it was a fever, because Sis
told him
she felt really hot.

Finally, I found out what was making
them so
sick……-a big eel ;had gotten inside his
pants
somehow. It just jumped out of his pants
and
stood there, about 10 inches long,
honest, anyway
he grabbed it in one hand to keep it from
getting
away.

When Sis saw it, she got really scared-her
eyes
got big, and her mouth fell open, and
she started
calling out to God and stuff like that. She
said it
was the biggest one she’s ever seen; I
should tell
her about the ones down at the lake by
our house!

Anyway, Sis got brave and tried to kill the
eel by
biting its head off. All of a sudden she
grabbed it
with both hands and held it tight while he
took a
muzzle out of his pocket and slipped it
over the
eel’s head to keep it from biting again.

Sis lay back and spread her legs so she
could get
a scissor-lock on it and he helped by lying
on top
of the eel. The eel put up a hell of a
fight.

Sis started groaning and squealing and
her
boyfriend almost upset the couch. I guess
they
wanted to kill the eel by squashing it
between
them.

After a while they both quit moving and
gave a
great sigh. Her boyfriend got up, and sure
enough,
they killed the eel. I knew because it just
hung
there, limp, and some of its insides were
hanging
out.

Sis and her boyfriend were a little tired
from the
battle, but they went back to courting
anyway. He
started hugging and kissing her again. By
golly,
the eel wasn’t dead! It jumped straight up
and
started to fight again.

I guess eels are like cats- they have nine
lives or
something. This time, Sis jumped up and
tried to
kill it by sitting on it. After about a 35
minute
struggle, they finally killed the eel. I knew
it was
dead, because I saw Sis’s boyfriend peel
its skin
off and flush it down the toilet.

ewan ko na lang dun sa nanay kung anong nangyari.. haha.. ginawa pang spy yung anak.. tsk tsk tsk…

Posted in mga patalastas | | | 0 Comments

WHAT IF –by babyface

September 9th, 2006 by fountainpen

I ran into a friend of yours the other day
And I asked her how you been
She said my girl is fine jus bought a house
Got a job a real good man
I told her I was glad for u that’s wonderful
But does she ever ask bout me
She said shes happy with her life right now
Let her go let her be

And I told myself I would
but something in my heart would just not let you go
I just want to know

What if we were wrong about each other
what if you were really made for me
what if we were supposed to be together
would that not mean anything
what if that was supposed to be my house
that you go home to everyday
how can you be sure that things are better
if you cant be sure your heart ain’t still here with me
Still wanting me

Your friend asked me if there was some1 special
in my life that I was seeing
I told her there was no1 in particular
There’s jus I myself and me
I told her that I dream of you quite often
she jus cut her eyes at me
she said you’ve got a home you’re very happy
so jus stop your meddling

I told her that I won’t
I said that things were cool
but I guess I was wrong
I still cant move on

What if we were wrong about each other
what if you were really made for me
what if we were supposed to be together
would that not mean anything
what if that was supposed to be my house
that you go home to everyday
how can you be sure that things are better
if you cant be sure your heart ain’t still here with me
Still wanting me

Now that could be my car
that could be my house
that could be my baby boy
that you’re nursing
that could be the trash
That I always take out
that could be the chair
I love to chill in

That could be my food on the table at the end of the day
hugs and the kisses all the love being made
what the hell do u expect me to say
what if its really supposed be this way
what if you’re really supposed to be with me

What if we were wrong about each other
what if you were really made for me
what if we were supposed to be together
would that not mean anything
what if that was supposed to be my house
that you go home to everyday
how can you be sure that things are better
if you cant be sure your heart ain’t still here with me
Still wanting me

What if we were wrong about each other
what if you were really made for me
what if we were supposed to be together
would that not mean anything
what if that was supposed to be my house
that you go home to everyday
how can you be sure that things are better
if you cant be sure your heart ain’t still here with me
Still wanting me

Posted in lyrics | | | 0 Comments

THIS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE –by paul mcCartney

September 8th, 2006 by fountainpen

I’m very sure, this never happened to me before
I met you and now I’m sure
This never happened before

Now I see, this is the way it’s supposed to be
I met you and now I see
This is the way it should be

This is the way it should be, for lovers
They shouldn’t go it alone
It’s not so good when your on your own

So come to me, now we can be what we want to be
I love you and now I see
This is the way it should be
This is the way it should be

This is the way it should be, for lovers
They shouldn’t go it alone
It’s not so good when your on your own

I’m very sure, this never happened to me before
I met you and now I’m sure
This never happened before (This never happened before)
This never happened before (This never happened before)
This never happened before (This never happened before)
This never happened before

Posted in lyrics | | | 0 Comments

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